They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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