Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
