So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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