did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Do you still have your period?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
