Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
