I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize