He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
It's shark week go big or go home
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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