It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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