I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
