i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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