I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
