She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
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