you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
