I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Randomize
