well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Randomize
