Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
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