I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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