they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I just want nice things and good sex
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize