My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Randomize
