I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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