im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
