I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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