dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
