She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
