There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
