brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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