Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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