i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize
