Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
