Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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