There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
