After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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