There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
