After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
