just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
