Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
