I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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