season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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