so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I need to calm my uterus...
I am available for nakedness
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
