conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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