I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
