no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Floor bacon is actually really good
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
