everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Randomize
