I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
