So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
