I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize