well I can't set my house on fire every night
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
