if you like me you must not know who I am
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
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