I have demons in me.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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