theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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